such a Pain in the ....

Okay so this week I have been having some "bowel issues". Monday morning I thought that I was having a slight alien attack in my lower abdomen, and was doubled over in pain. I thought it was a one time thing, but pretty much every day I keep getting these piercing pains. Now I am obviously being so mature about this and not using the gross terms that I plague my poor coworkers with. Anyways after being woken up around 2am last night with severe pains, I figured I should see a Dr. So I made my way today over to UCSD's medical center for my first ever visit. It was pretty awesome riding the ELEVATOR with some woman with a mask, who checked in before me with pretty much every flu symtom there was. Yes I should have taken the stairs. Anyways after my last awful experiences with my first Dr (i.e. taking 8 weeks to get proper treatment for a hurt wrist) I was so pleased with my experience today. They gave me a very thorough exam and did not miss any questions. Its difficult when you try to explain "ass pains" to two extremely intelligent women. I put it like this "well ya know when you really have to ......make a bowel movement?" "Well its like those severe ass pains like the poop is going to come out, but the pains weren't in my ass, they are in my abdomen." And that is when I got some shocked looks and fleeting eye contact. They handled it well, and I did my best to be as classy as I could. But lets face it, an ass pain is an ass pain. So they think that I have some cysts and that when I get "full intenstines" that it is adding pressure to them. So I am going for some ultrasounds that sound like a really good time next week.
So I am going to have to wake up super early tomorrow around 5am so that I can avoid any "ass pains" on the train ride we are taking up to San Juan Capistrano for our 50 mile bike ride. Who knows if the ride is bumpy enough I just may rupture these cysts and save myself some aggravation. Its always something!!!

Oh by the by, I am on the brink of reaching my minimum and would like to keep going and going. If you have not yet had the chance to donate please consider taking part in a great cause!!
http://pages.teamintraining.org/sd/VineHIrn09/jmerrill

Thanks!