Monday, August 31, 2009

Nama-frickin-ste

I feel obliged to post about todays happenings. I wanted to get my namaste on so I went to yoga this morning. Typically I am on the later side and so I have to just throw my mat down wherever I can fit. Today I got there a bit earlier and got a great spot by the mirror so I could check out my terrible form and perhaps correct it before the instructor came up to me everytime and readjusted me. Anyways I am lying there with my breath and all and I pick up a smell, no a stench. I open my eyes and see the smelly culprit and he is heading right for me! OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!! I do not do well with smells of any kind. I will never again complain about the smell of perfumes, or that I smell like a $2 whore after a funeral with the combination of the old lady perfumes all on me at one time. This smelly bastard parked his mat about 12 inches from mine. I didn't know what to do. I thought about moving, but all the good spots were taken and I thought it would be really obvious if I did that. But dude! How did he not know?! And if he knew why would he put 20 people through that. This is not a normal cool yoga studio, its hot as hell in there and is pretty small so we all suffered. I just suffered a little more than everyone else. So instead of saying something I just kept glaring at him in the mirror every once in a while with that "you make me sick" look on my face. I'm sorry but really. At the end I think the instructor realized what I endured and rubbed my face down with some minty lovely smelling substance. It was the most amazing thing ever. I normally hate smelly stuff, but I was just relieved to not be smelling this mans filth. I can still kind of taste it. Ew.
OMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

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